How They Kill Me
Their Words Are Like Knifes
My heart is a bitch.
I love him. I fucking love him with everything I am and have.
He could ask me to marry him right now and i’d say yes. He could sneak into my room when i’m sleeping, lay down next to me to sleep and i wouldn’t care. He everything I wanted and does things I didn’t even knew I need. He truly is the best thing I never knew I needed. Without him I feel destroyed. Like more then half of me is missing.
But one look from J.H & my heart stops. I get butterflies and I smile stupidly. I get jealous and frustrated. I wish I could never leave the comfort of his arms when he hugs me and I wish he would kiss me already. He isn’t more then my love, in fact he is less then my love in many ways. But how is someone who’s less dig a spot into my brain and crawls slowly into my heart each time I see him.
I love Jhiovanny. I want to marry him and have our two kids, Jason & Juliet. I want to bicker with him till the day I die and “hump like rabbits” till my hip gives out. My future is with him. I know it is. I never have nor will doubt that.
And with J.H, we have no future. We have drama. Your 22 and i’m 17. We work together. Tonight I asked you to man up or back off. But in my head I was screaming for you to back off. I don’t need you. I want you. I need and want Jhiovanny. I love him. I could love you, I know I could. But if we were to love it be poison. It would kill me slowly and nearly destroyed. I’ve been there and I refuse to go there again.
My love with Jhiovanny isn’t safe. It’s straining and difficult. We bicker and fight. We have double standards and different morals. But it’s real and strong and the most important thing in my life. I refuse to lose it.
- A Hyppolite.
Reblogged from mymouthwillbethedeathofme
If you’ve heard goodbye
And something inside just won’t heal
If a memory won’t set you free
And you know that it never will
Then you know how I feel
(Source: mymouthwillbethedeathofme)
